Because Fuck Misogyny

FC: Ok folks the Rape Train is pulling out of the station!

I heard this in fleet comms in my new alliance and my head fell back so that when my eyes rolled I didn’t sprain something.  Not one day in and already someone makes “the joke.”

Ok, look.  I know that shock humor is “in” and that somehow includes Rape humor.  Because Rape is hilarious.  Because the 1 in 3 women and around 1 in 20 men don’t mind you making light of the experiences they’ve gone through, and never suffer from extreme psychological issues because of what happened to them.  Because your ability to make a lame, unfunny joke is more important than them.

Rape isn’t funny.  It’s so not funny that many third world countries use it as torture for political prisoners, or as part of ethnic warfare.  Africa, South America, Asia, Europe, all across the world this horrible crime is used by men to oppress the female population.¹  When you joke about it, your joke has the same effect on the survivors of this crime.  It is an oppressive act that is potentially IMMENSELY harmful to the survivors.  Over at Afternoon Snooze Button they had a great post, for those of you in the Short Attention Span Theater crowd, I’ll post a nice summary she leaves at the bottom:

  • Rape is a type of torture, and rape victims experience severe psychological trauma that goes well beyond the physical damage.
  • The prevalence of sexual assault makes it much more likely that either a rapist or a rape victim will hear a given joke about rape.
  • Rape jokes perpetuate our society’s fucked up belief that rape isn’t serious.
  • Rape jokes empower would-be rapists.
  • Rape jokes further harm the victims of rape.

Rape isn’t murder, where the odds of actually encountering it in the circle of people you know are vanishingly small.  Rape occurs everywhere, especially in the US.  1 in 3 women is a survivor of rape.  Odds are pretty good that this includes someone you know, even you making the terrible joke.  That person may not mind it but I bet someone else does.  I want more people playing EvE, and I want more women to feel free to join this community.

So let’s take a look at Rape Train.  I think this definition is mostly what people are looking for when they use it in gaming:

This act usually happens during games, either in Sports or in a video game. The rape train refers to one completely destroying/conquering their adversaries, you cant just fuck up one person it has to be a majority. It is a rare act but when it happens everyone around is left in awe, speechless if you will. The person who initiated the rape train event deserves a firm pat on the ass or a much less gay high five with a verbal acknowledgement. The “Rape Trainer” must respond with sounds related to old steam driven trains from the 1800’s.

Despite being “frothing at the mouth” mad about the issue in general, having been on the right side of a night of total domination and ruination of my foes, I know that the desire to put into words just how harshly and totally one has crushed ones’ enemies demands to be met.  Fine.  Let’s not put the word “Rape” in there though.  It doesn’t serve a purpose to enhance anything but the suffering of people to whom the only connection it has is to something horrible and hurtful.  Let’s find a better train to ride.

Same challenge as last time.  Whoever comes up with the best alternative to “Rape Train” to express the complete and utter domination of their enemies gets a shiny new plex in Jita 4-4.

¹ http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Rape_in_the_Bosnian_War#Major_Conclusions among others

I'm using it every time I can

I’m using it every time I can

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About Corelin

An Eve playing Fool who occasionally writes about the shenanigans he and his minions get up to.

Posted on December 15, 2012, in Meta, Quit with the Rape Jokes Already, Things I think I think. Bookmark the permalink. 36 Comments.

  1. “Curb-stomping” has a long and hallowed tradition, just as brutal with none of the misogyny. Bonus: the fbeeptard’s quote there can be replaced with something like “get your boots on!”

  2. Every 3rd woman had a raped experience?

    • In the US correct, 1 in 3 women has experienced rape. In some demographics it’s much higher.

      • Thats a bullshit statistic often brandied about by media and groups with an agenda to sell. Real annual numbers have been going down for over 3 decades now and in the US the actual victim rate is less than 1 in a 1000 for people over 12 years old (per year).

        Its an outright lie to claim that every 3rd woman in the US has been raped.

      • Oh, before I am misunderstood: I don’t disagree with you in principle. It would be better to use less offensive words in gaming in general and players should be mindfull of what they are saying.
        But the stats you are peddling are simply net representative of reality in any western country. Horrible though the crime may be, its not the epidemic that the media often love to portray and readers would be better served if you didn’t blindly copy their lust for sensation and hysterics.

  3. There is one problem with such “down with evil `jokes`” movement: how do you implement/enforce it? Do YOU quit the fleet where the FC tells such `jokes`? Do YOU quit your corp if the corp chat is littered by that? If you do, the others have to make a choice: the `joke` or you. If you just mumble here, they can ignore you.

    • Well here is a big part of it, I also try to talk with leadership, make notes and try to increase awareness of the issue, if it keeps up and becomes an issue I won’t participate in events with folks who do cause problems. In general, quitting on the spot makes YOU look like a douche, and tends to cause people to defend the person actually being a jerk, no matter the reason, but taking the time to come back later and explain reasonably what you think needs to change meets with a much better reception.

    • rapeisntfunny@mailinator.com

      I think I’ll post “Rape isn’t funny.” in fleet chat whenever I hear these jokes. Short, simple. If anyone contradicts that, they’ll look bad really quick.

  4. Computer games are full of violent language. What makes the word rape and different from flippantly using terms relating to violence or murder?

    • I’m not saying murder is “better” but it’s less likely to affect someone in your group. Statistically speaking everyone knows someone who was raped (whether they realize that person was raped or not) whereas murder is exceedingly rare, nightly news shows notwithstanding.

      • Ouch yes, sorry for spamming you a bit here, but this is exacty why I called you on the 1 in 3 thing. Murders are not exceedingly rare in the US, and certainly not when compared to rape numbers.

        In fact according to the stats from the US department of justice, http://www.fbi.gov/about-us/cjis/ucr/crime-in-the-u.s/2011/crime-in-the-u.s.-2011/offenses-known-to-law-enforcement/offenses-known-to-law-enforcement. There where about 14600 murders in the US in 2011 and about 83400 raped. Which gives us a victim rate of about 4.7 murders per 100K inhabitants and 52.7 rapes per 100K female inhabitants.

        I really don’t like you claiming that statistically everyone knows a rape victim (or a rapist for that matter) Its simply not true. I wish you would stick to the moral discussion of this topic and not use such misinformation to get people on your side.

      • DoJ only reports investigations. Not incidents. Also does not include DoD reports. The military has a truly horrifying rate.

      • Oh, I know and understand that rape is under-reported. Especially for males. But even if only 1 in 10 cases gets investigated, that still leaves us at an estimate of 0.5% per year for female victims. All I’m saying is that the 1 in 3 number is media hype.

        And I am not aware of the rape numbers in the US military, but again I would caution against using hyberboles. A solid number, with a good reference, would imo be a lot more usefull.

  5. I wrote on the topic the other month when some hate mail directed at me went sour. Poet crossposted it to reddit and in general I received the message not to take it seriously and its sad that I am so easily offended.

    There was also a lot of support as well. I did learn that some people do not want morals to chase them down on the internet in a mandatory way.

    http://lowseclifestyle.blogspot.com/2012/10/hate-mail.html

    http://lowseclifestyle.blogspot.com/2012/10/hate-mail-update-petition-created.html

  6. This is a a good response to wanting to prevent jokes of other people. Even rape jokes in particular.

  7. This is, oddly enough, one reason I like Fweddit. Our go-to statement for completely defeating an enemy fleet is “Man, we HAZED those nerds.” Or something along those lines. It’s both very evocative and very amusing, since we’re all playing internet spaceships.

  8. You are so completely 100% correct Corelin. Of the three long term relationships I’ve had in my life I know for a fact one is a rape survivor. People who us rape as a joke have no idea what the are playing at. It is like someone playing Call of Duty and thinking they know what real combat is like. They don’t. They can’t. Thinking they do is one of the most arrogant conceits the human mind is capable of entertaining. So back to rape, the way stop it is to very loudly and publicly state, “I do not put up with that sort of humor and keep your mouth shut if you can’t think of a less offensive way to state your opinion.” And keep saying that. Make the feud public. Do it every time some immature male (usually) twerp uses the word in a juvenile attempt to be “funny.” It isn’t funny: not for the victims and not for those of us who truly understand what rape is. If you use it in my presence I will all you a rapist. There is no difference. The affect is the same on the victims. YOU ARE A RAPIST. Think about that for awhile – facing the corner preferably. Thank you for coming out and saying this Corelin. It can never be said enough. For all of you who think Corelin is out of line, grow up. YOU are the problem, not him. The fact you don’t understand that tells me you are in serious need of some maturity. Rape is never funny, it is never right. When you use it as “humor” you are not only inconsiderate but are also abetting the crime and frankly beneath contempt; just STFU.

    • My reading of one feminist argument is that rape jokes are bad because they trivialize a horrific crime. Likewise, calling people rapists who are not rapists, merely tremendous assholes seems to be walking a very fine line.

  9. Fantastic post. I try to come up with more “in-character” types of phrasing when FCing, hopefully something equally graphic but only ingame offensive, if I’m making any sense.

    • I could see Roc as the “Terry Tate” of his corporation actually…

    • I agree with the good Colonel. The meta is getting a little TOO pervasive in the in-game, to the point where despite the new attempts at live events, etc, to promote the “lore” and all, people just don’t think of EVE as its own world anymore. The way I see it it’s basically like playing a Halo game in Xbox Live. There’s 15 other Mastur Cheefs running around, and there’s really no ‘immersion’ like you get in campaign modes. So yeah, people are just themselves, worse to the Nth degree because :internet anonymity: …
      I really feel sorry for the few remaining ‘true RPers’ left out there. I have friends who are, or try to be, good RPers, and struggle with local and their char identities when trying to ‘play out’ their ‘part’ when some dude is like ‘hey whai u talk funny? fag.’ :-/

      EVE is a sandbox, but some of the sands are better than others. ;)

  10. Time for some pwnage/noob pwnage;

    I am a somewhat older gamer who prefers a more subtle approach; so for me ‘rearrange the deck chairs’ would be suitable (all irony intended)

  11. I prefer wafflestomp myself… just like the way it sounds and the image it brings…

  12. I was with a female FC yesterday, and comms and fleet chat were pretty different from most of the time.

  13. When one makes something taboo, in doing so, one creates a very strong incentive to break that taboo. Humor can be transgressive, it can be about violating norms and taboos. In many ways, this is an un-winable fight. If you really want to combat “rape-culture” then you should take on the people who say: “if you can’t do the time, don’t do the crime” and mean it. As long as there are Holocausts, there will be Holocaust jokes.

  14. Hmm, there is 2 sides to this. I understand what you try to do, but i don’t agree.
    I for one are for freedom of speech, first and foremost.

    That includes the bad jokes as much as speaking up against them.
    Tell them that you don’t find it funny at all. Voice your opinion, try to change the community you fly with. Some corps in eve have rules for that, others don’t.

    But Eve isn’t a game for little kids, we don’t need to be protected from foul language. I can think of plenty stuff i would find worse then that joke.
    Hell, sometimes some stuff just goes on my nerves, even if its tame compared.
    Curb-stomping for example makes me cringe. Way more then rape.

    If you think about words hard enough you can find an issue in anything.

    I really cant come up for that firgure of speech, that wouldnt offend anyone.
    Because in essence it means what was said. A violent domination of helpless others.
    You can sugar coat that as you like, still the same thing.

    • I’m not saying they can’t. That would be a violation of freedom of speech. I’m saying they SHOULDN’T and that’s not a violation of freedom of speech. I want to find a better alternative to encourage people to use more sensitive language.

  15. For Oekedulleke, you’re making a mistake in your stats.

    See, a woman raped counts as a woman raped for the rest of her life. A person murdered only counts the year he died. It’s not 1 in 3 this year, it’s 1 in 3 women have been raped (or sexually assaulted, which is actually the way that report usually gets made.)

    If you assume the undercount is only 1 in 10 (many studies say it’s more), and if you assume that the ~84,000 number is fairly constant (it’s low compared to most previous years, and if we add sexual assault it increases more), and if you assume you only need to count ages 20 to 65 (do I really need to point out why that’s wrong?) you “only” have a bit less than 38 million rapes. Out of roughly 143 million women (counting children) according to the 2010 US census. 4 of 14, or just under 1 in 5 – assuming your assumptions (which are understated) are right.

    If you have ten women you trust to tell you the truth, ask them if they’ve ever been raped or sexually assaulted. If your results are like those of most men I’ve asked, at least three will say “yes”. Probably more; and that’s consistent enough for me to guess the 1 in 3 is low.

  16. Now I know why you insisted on calling it a ‘rage cage’ all those years ago…

  17. Look. Rape jokes can be funny. Not often, but they can. Some comics use the taboo, the shock factor, and they mock this terrible thing. By mocking it, they can (hopefully) lessen it’s power.

    This being said – it is not what we’re talking about here in Eve. These people are not trying to be funny. They’re not trying to inform. They’re not thinking about the issue. And using such a term out of hand is wrong, and it is reprehensible.

    The only way to stop these people from thinking that this language is acceptable is to continually (even if gently) remind them that it is unacceptable every time it is mentioned.

    It really saddens me that (from comments on EN24) this looks like an uphill battle.

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