Category Archives: World of Tanks

How Is Gud Tenk?

So I’ve talked a lot about World of Tanks, but I haven’t really talked about what makes a tank “good” so I’ll take a hack at it.

Fast and a good gun.  *mic drop*

Oh, wait, you wanted a real breakdown?  Sigh.  Fiiiiine.

Really you have to have a good blend.  There’s tanks with amazing guns at their tier, there’s tanks who can write their name at 300m, there’s tanks that would be slowed down if they could instantly teleport and there’s tanks that seem to have the ability to eat a ton of shots.  Some of them are good tanks, some of them are terrible, despite a big strength.  I’m going to look at “Good Tanks” through the lens of three vehicles.  The IS-3, the Object 416, and the AMX 50 100.

The IS-3 is the brawler par excellence.  It has enough mobility to get there; enough armor to survive prolonged fights, especially while sidescraping, and a great gun for close in work.  The gun cannot snipe, and the tank can get worn down as its armor is not impenetrable, but it doesn’t have to snipe with its mobility, and it can live long enough to get in close.  It can also punch up the tiers and affect higher tier battles.  What makes this tank great?  It has enough of everything to get through nearly any situation.

The Object 416 has a punchy gun, immense speed and combines a low profile and troll armor to zip in, burn something down, and get the fuck out.  The gun isn’t awfully accurate, and has godawful handling, but it hits hard and reloads ludicrously fast.  The tank has immense straight-line speed, allowing it to blaze across the battlefield more like a hovercraft than a tank.  It turns pretty damn poorly, so you have to plan your movement with some forethought, but the speed more than balances that out.  The armor is just… insane.  If I got penetrated by a small child blowing bubbles, I’d believe it.  There’s places where you can almost imagine shots going right through the tank and into its neighbor.  On the other hand I’ve bounced shots from Object 704s with that lovely BL-10 because the angles on this tank are just SO extreme.  The armor isn’t “functional” in that it can be counted on to bounce shot after shot in a prolonged engagement, but it can be relied on to protect you while you are moving from stray shots.  What makes it great?  It delivers a great gun to key spots on the battlefield fast and in relative safety.

Then there’s the AMX 50 100.  There’s no armor.  None.  The “protection scheme” for this vehicle consists of: A. Kill them fast or B.  Be somewhere else.  The gun is pretty damn amazing.  Fast firing autoloader with 6 shots, enough damage potential to wreck a LOT of on tier vehicles in about 10 seconds, great penetration, acceptable accuracy, but otherwise poor handling, the tank travels like a sports car, it accelerates well to its top speed, turns well, and generally gets you where you need to be.  Again the armor is nonexistent but your best armor is killing them all before they shoot you.  What makes this tank great?  SO MUCH DAMAGE.  There’s times I’ve pulled out against full health, on-tier tanks and pulled back to reload in the cover behind the smoking wreck of their tank.  And it feels good.

Next week I will talk about some bad tanks.  British Heavies might want to get a head start on hiding.  We know how slow you are after all…

World of Tanks: Finding What I Like

So I have gone back to WoT because it’s a fun game and it lends itself to short sessions or binges, depending on my stress level and how much of my own incompetence i can put up with.  I like this game, it’s fun, there’s as much depth as you want to put into it.

I’ve bounced around a bit.  The German TD line has long been a favorite, the artistry of their long guns, and the occasional silliness of the Derp gun on the Hetzer leans into my sweet spot of mixing art and brutality.  I repurchased my Hetzer because… it’s a good, fun experience with the ability to utterly dominate if you play smart.  I’m not talking brilliant, I’m talking smart.  Currently I’m up to the Jadgpanther II which is a very nice vehicle but… just lacks something so far.  Like the top tier gun…  Still working on it.  I loved the Marder II.  It’s murder.  The Hetzer is great fun, and might be the best Tier IV vehicle.  the Stug is also good but without the dominance of the Hetzer.  The JgPz IV is an awful, awful grind.  The Jagdpanther on the other hand is a joy.  There’s so many options with that vehicle and it can play the sniper role then turn it around and go crazy with good rate of fire, damage, and pen.

The Russian heavy line is crazy fun.  I got the glory day of the KV-1 Derp Gun.  You could go crazy and alpha half the enemy team with near misses.  The KV2 is now a higher tier vehicle that gets worse matchmaking and has a terrible turret.  I have the KV-85 which is a hoot, and leads into the IS line which has a lot of agile, powerful tanks that play like heavy-mediums from what I’ve seen.

I’m working into the French Heavy Line.  So far I’m stuck on the B1.  This tank just doesn’t like me.  It’s a plodder and I want to get into the more graceful tanks the french get later on.

The Americans have a really good heavy line with the superlative T29, and to get into it you can go the route of the M4A3E2 which is just a silly, silly vehicle.  It’s on the slow side for a medium, but still plays like a medium.  It has the firepower of a medium, but on the good side of it, and it has the armor of a good heavy.  I bounce shots off this thing with even the Jagdpanther II without good aiming.  It also has the solid M4 Sherman and the utterly dreadful M3 Lee.  Seriously this tank is so bad it should be thrown out.

The American Light line features speed and size.  VERY tall tanks with blazing speed and minuscule guns even by light standards.  I like playing them but it takes patience.  You can’t just race in you have to move intelligently.  Not my best line but a fun line.

The American TD line is a bit silly.  A lot of them are built on light or fast medium hulls.  This, combined with their light armor gives them blazing speed.  They also feature turrets and some crazy guns for their tiers.  They also tend to blow up on a sneeze and with open turrets they get eaten alive by artillery.

Right now the order I tend to play in on any given day is T29, T67, KV-85, Hetzer (gotta Hetz) B1 (ugh).